Al’s Breakfast – No website, link goes to Yelp page

This post is written by my partner Talls who was at a conference in Minnesota recently.  Thanks to covering brunchiness even when I was not there to bitch about it!

How small is Al’s Breakfast?

It’s so small that the entire restaurant is 10 feet wide.

It’s so small that there are only 14 seats.

How small is it? Check out the picture from Google Maps:

It’s real fuckin’ small.

You ain’t kiddin’, pal.

I got there and there was a line with about 20 people outside the building, and maybe another 20 inside. (Yes, they fucking crammed a line into a restaurant that’s 10 feet wide.) That doesn’t sound so bad?

Remember: 14 seats.

It was just over an hour before I got to sit down. Either don’t go on a sunday, or bring a fucking book.

The place, as they say, has character.

Also dinosaur toys for kids.

For kids, I said.

Enough with the fucking decor, how’s the food?

Corned Beef Hash, pancakes, and juice.

On the down side, they think that stuff in the front is corned beef hash. It is not. It is hash browns that someone waved some fucking corned beef over. Some day I shall write a fucking tirade about how people cannot fucking figure out corned beef hash, but not today.

On the up side, those pancakes? Fucking delicious. Blackberry pancakes with a big pat of butter and maple syrup (which you have to buy, but is cheap). They did those fuckers right. It’s a good thing I got the water because I would have burned my tongue off with the delicious blackberries otherwise. The OJ is not fresh-squeezed, but is miles better than canned.

The omelets also looked amazing. I don’t have a picture because I didn’t want to be the creepy fuck who was like CAN I PHOTOGRAPH YOUR BREAKFAST FOR MY GIRLFRIEND’S EXPLETIVE-FILLED BRUNCH BLOG? but they looked great.

Oh, and in case you can’t read my bill upside-down, the whole thing came out to about $13. Fuck yeah.

So, short version: If you are in Minneapolis in the morning: go to Al’s Breakfast. Not on a weekend. Get pancakes. The end.